The new Popcast is up, about six minutes of observations and whatnot. Today, we talk about Kevin Dubrow starting hard rock in the 1980s, and why the people who killed it are still alive and well and making music.
The new Popcast is up, about four minutes of observations and whatnot. Today, let's discuss why I can't seem to keep up with National Blog Posting Month, and why I not only don't shop the day after Thanksgiving, I try not to leave my house.
On this Thanksgiving, I'd like to say thanks for many things.
1. My friends and family, Kimberly, Pup, and everyone else who makes life worth living.
2. The people who read this blog, especially those who leave comments. I've made quite a few friends over the past year who are also writers, and I want to wish them luck, as well. Keep working, guys, and we'll all get there together.
3. The August And Everything After album by Counting Crows.
4. George Carlin's early career, Johnny Carson's enduring wit, and David Letterman's eternal randomness.
5. Mario Puzo's The Godfather.
6. People who watch me on TV and get my jokes.
7. Family Guy.
8. Tuna sandwiches.
9. The Office, Scrubs, 30 Rock, and My Name Is Earl.
The new Popcast is up, five minutes of pop culture-y talk through a sore throat and scratchy voice. It's a bit short this week, allergies have given me a case of major market radio voice. The writer's strike is still a big topic, along with the realization that we should all be stockpiling watching material for the lean winter, and the fact that the networks have just given up on Saturdays completely.
In news that would have been much more relevant twenty years ago, Boy George has been charged with false imprisonment for chaining a male escort to a wall in his apartment.
Let that sink in for a moment. Ready? Okay, let's continue.
Who does he think he is, Rick James?
My God, that's horrible. It's not only awful, it's certainly not profitable. That poor guy's spent a weekend handcuffed to a radiator in a bad part of town, and he can't even sue Boy George for any money.
That's like getting your car crashed into by Mr. Mister's touring van, or getting your nose broken in a bar fight by Young MC. You don't exactly have shady lawyers beating down your door to file a frivolous lawsuit. What are you going to get in a judgement from Boy George, cigarette butts and lip gloss?
To begin with, I was in the store the other day looking for a Birthday card, and I saw a shelf full of Thanksgiving Cards. Who the Hell needs a greeting card on Thanksgiving? What do they say?
-- "Thanks for cooking for me and letting me pass out on your couch in front of the Lions game." -- "I'm not sure how we're related, but thanks for the free meal." -- "Happy Day, because neither of us are Indians!"
Anyway, the Christmas season is already here. First week of November is a good enough time to start playing the Christmas carols, I suppose. Got to get all of that Christmas crap off of the shelves by December 19th, when we start putting out the Valentine's Day stuff.
In all honesty, I don't think you should be playing Christmas music in the time of the year where Mary wouldn't have even been pregnant with the baby Jesus yet, do you?
And although we all enjoy checking out the time other people take to staple shiny stuff to their houses, lets be honest. If you are proudly displaying your Christmas lights in early November, it's a dead giveaway that you never took them down last year, Chester. Wait until after Thanksgiving, and just play along and pretend.
Redone holiday Christmas music is the worst. It was cool for a short period of time, but now, come on. Do we really need to hear the next generation of "Behind The Music" subjects and "Surreal Life" housemates mangling "Oh Holy Night" and "Jingle Bell Rock"?
On a related note, many of the Ethiopian famine victims in the mid 80's are actually living better than the people who sang on Band Aid's "Do They Know It's Christmas" song. I swear I saw an Ethiopian Relief Album for Bananarama the other day.
Bounty hunter Duane "Dog" Chapman made extremely racist remarks in a conversation with one of his sons, and now he's losing his television show.
First thought: Aren't we asking a little too much to be looking for total cultural sensitivity from an ex-convict with a seventh-grade education, nineteen robbery and murder charges, six wives and thirteen kids?
Second thought: That show is still on? Seriously? I thought that whole "Hunting Cons For Jesus" crap went away years ago.
In news of head-shaking proportions, it appears that Joe Pesci and Angie Everhart are dating.
This really seems strange on the surface. And on the level after that, and a few levels below that, and pretty much all the way right down to the genetic code.
Everyone will look at this couple and say that Joe Pesci is getting the better of the deal. I disagree. I think this is really good for Angie Everhart. Think about it. All the pressure is off of her. She can eat what she wants, stop wearing make up and working out, and totally let herself go. Even after ten years of doing that, she'd still be too good for Joe Pesci.
The new Popcast is up, roughly six minutes of observations and whatnot. Today's episode deals with the writer's strike, and reality shows I'm terrified are coming. I'll also briefly touch on why it's never good to set yourself up as an expert on anything, what's good on TV this week, and Dr. Phil's big fat ass.
The founder of the Weather Channel has come out and said he considers global warming the "greatest scam in history."
Whoa. This should clearly show us what the endorsement of someone who's wrong 50% of the time is worth, shouldn't it?
Of course, what do the weathermen think about it? Whenever I'm confused about an issue, I always consider what people who are wrong most of the time have to say. While we're at it, how do the televangelists who swore the world would end on January 1, 2000 feel? What's the guy who came up with that "Anchorwoman" TV show think?
Let's examine the Weather Channel for a moment. These are people whose favorite thing in the world is to tell us how dangerous the conditions are somewhere and we should evacuate. Then they drive into those areas, park their cars, and do live reports from the hurricane.
Nobody ever keeps a weatherman's batting average, do they? As a science, it's not exactly simple math.
Anyway, there are things going on with our environment that are very troubling. Personally, the fact that half of California seems to catch fire every year is a bit of a head-scratcher to me. There's things going on that we can't explain, and global warming is one theory at this point.
This shouldn't be a political issue, why attack the messenger? Coleman's statement was peppered with words and phrases like "dastardly scientists," "environmental whacko," "extremists," "liberal," "radical agenda." No judging there. Nah, he's not taking sides on this one at all.
My main problem with people who want to deny global warming is the damage they do to our national psyche by rejecting not only the cause, but also the entire message. Is global warming real? I'm not completely sure, but I know that we produce an astonishing amount of waste as a culture and we need to do something about it.
If entertaining the notion that we need to do something will help make things a little bit better, then why not? If you disagree with global warming, why do you also need to come down on people who support environmental causes? NBC is spending all week addressing the environment, and people are ripping them left and right.
If you can go to Wal-Mart and buy a lightbulb you don't have to replace every six weeks, why not do it? Why bring Al Gore into it at all?
Personally, if the threat of the polar icecaps melting leads redneck Joe Public to recycle his trash, get a hybrid car, and stop pouring his used motor oil down his bathtub, I'm all for it.
Not sure how I missed this one, but there was a news story about a 57-year-old Bulgarian woman killed her son, went to prison, was released because she had terminal cancer, then went home and killed her husband.
She was originally sentenced to 15 years for killing her 29-year-old son with a garden hoe while he was sleeping. She got out, went home and stabbed her husband in the throat with a knife.
Apparently, Bulgarian prisons are a bit lenient. Fifteen years for gardening somebody to death seems a bit light for me.
Hmm. Seems to me that Katie Holmes is getting ready to run for her life, "Sleeping With The Enemy" style. At least now when she gets ready to escape, she'll be able to get at least twenty-six miles away from Tom Cruise. Whenever I see someone accomplish something time consuming like that, and that person doesn't really have a job or anything else that would infringe on their time, I'm just not that impressed. I just assume that if the rest of us didn't have to go to work and we had people to keep our kids, we could all run marathons, start bands, and write diet books based on common sense.
Damn Lies, Statistics, Dane Cook, and Mitch Hedberg
I was checking out some write-ups on NFL.com, and found this little tidbit on the Oakland-Houston game. Quarterback Josh McCown threw three interceptions, and NFL.com is quick to point out that "The Raiders are 1-3 when McCown throws an interception."
Thanks for the snippet of information, NFL. However, the Raiders are 2-6 on the season. Simple math indicates not only are they 1-3 when he throws a pick, they're also 1-3 when he doesn't throw one, too.
This is the same kind of attention to statistical detail that made movie executives think we actually want to see films starring Dane Cook.
Seriously, how many comedies is he going to star in before they realize nobody's watching them? Mitch Hedberg never got to make a movie, but Dane gets one about every six weeks that plays for ten days and goes to video.
Apologies for the quasi-dirty title, but I felt pretty sure that would crank up the blog hits and Google searches today.
Anyway, let's play a little game I like to call "Spot The Typo Made By A Sexually Excited Publicist." This is from a press release on the new movie Beowulf, which I am reasonably sure will suck. Just in case they've changed it, it reads as such:
"Angelina Jolie has admitted she was got a little shy when she saw her nude scenes in her latest film Beowulf.
The actress says although the nude scenes were stimulated, she was still a little embarrassed. 'I was a little shy,' she says. 'I was really surprised that I felt that exposed. There were certain moments where I actually felt shy – and called home, just to explain that the fun movie that I had done that was digital animation was, in fact, a little different than we expected.'"
Yeah, I'm reasonably sure some underpaid publicist intern was looking at the press kit photos of a scantily-clad Angelina Jolie, and his mind just sort of wandered away from simulated nudity to stimulated nudity. I wouldn't mind seeing either, to be honest with you.
By the way, Jolie will appear in the movie Wanted next, which is adapted from a comic book but apparently without all of the elements that made the comic interesting. I don't understand how the film industry is going to be hurt by a writer's strike when 70% of what's released is from either a TV show or a comic book. What's next? "Goofus and Gallant: The Movie?"
The University of Tennessee has suspended tailback LaMarcus Coker for missing his drug counseling sessions, according to ESPN. That certainly an unfortunate name for a problem like that, don't you think?
By the way, the Vols also suspended lineman Mark Weedman, defensive back Clarence Methmouth, and receiver Johnny Nyquil.
Here's this week's edition of the PopCast, dealing with all things Pop Culture. This week, I talk about my quest to get published, and why I've decided to not write this month in hopes of getting there. I'll also talk about my horrible failures at NaNoWriMo so far, and why I don't think it's a good idea.
Not sure how or why I missed it, but Sam Brownback announced last week that he is withdrawing in his bid to become President.
Since I had forgotten he existed, that brings up a good question. If you're running for President, but no one knows it, do you actually have to announce to people unaware of your intentions that you're changing your mind?
I, Reid Kerr, do hereby announce I am not running for President. I will not run, if elected, I will not serve. While I'm at it, I also will not produce the next Jay-Z album, pet-sit for Ellen Degeneres, or quarterback the Oakland Raiders.
I will not perform at the Super Bowl, join the Wu Tang Clan, or direct the "Watchmen" movie. I will not be serving as Britney's AA sponsor, nor will I or join the cast of The View, nor am I the Next Top Model.
And above all else, under no circumstances will I be Dancing With The Stars.
