Just saw in Variety that Universal Pictures is going to do a remake of remake of Videodrome.
Let me be clear here. I don't mind bad movies. I'm a fan of them. I actually watched Death Wish V the other night, in which a seventy-three year-old Charles Bronson dealt vigilante justice to heavily armed organized crime figures, even though he could obviously barely walk around anymore.
Don't know why. I just found it on, and I thought, "Hey, Bronson's usually good for a couple of murders, a shoot-out, and some unintentional hilarity. What the heck."
So anyway, I know what I'm talking about when the subject of bad movies comes up. Videodrome, however, was in a class by itself. This is one of the most incomprehensible movies I ever remember seeing. I say that because while many awful movies fade away over time (Speed Zone, Catwoman) and only leave a vague memory of badness, I still remember watching Videodrome on HBO and trying to make sense of it.
The movie is like watching a movie about an acid trip while actually taking an acid trip. James Woods is the lead, and he's going crazy throughout the movie. His hand is a gun, except it isn't, except when it is. Debbie Harry is naked in the movie, which really isn't that big of a draw. James Woods has a hole in his stomach that he keeps stuffing Betamax tapes into.
The whole thing is an allegory for...something. Not sure what.
For those of you who are sports fans, or for those of you who enjoy obscure pop culture references, I'll be blogging the 2009 NFL Draft live at my column over at Examiner.com. It's a Mystery Science Theatre 3000 approach to the draft, I promise you plenty of laughs as the picks start to pile up.
Check it out here, updated live during the first round of the draft all day long today.
As for your entertainment for today, check this video out. This is what happens when you find the rare combination of news anchors who don't read ahead in the script, and producers who hate them.
I tend to let things get kind of messy at my house. The other day I tried to throw something on the floor and missed.
When I see "Coach Season I On DVD: Limited Edition", I agree. It's limited for a good, common-sense reason.
I like going to PetSmart, because I can pee anywhere I like and nobody notices.
Why don't they make a video game where you're delivering foreign aid? That might make international peace and prosperity a little bit sexier.
If women really want to wear a fragrance that attracts men, they should make a perfume that smells like the laundry aisle. Or perhaps the first whiff from a freshly opened bag of potato chips.
Lesson: Never try and make witty small talk with a girl whose earrings are bigger than her head.
If a medication is referred to as "Maximum Strength," why would you ever need to take more than one of them at a time?
I just got Eddie Money's Greatest Hits album, and I can remember clearly two of his songs that were released as singles with videos that are not included on the album. I'm not sure what that says about his management team, nor am I certain what that says about me.
Idle Thought: I caught part of "To Die For" on cable the other night. Is that the best movie Nicole Kidman has ever made that takes place in the present day? You know, disqualify any role she's had where she was wearing a hoop skirt and doing a Merchant Ivory flick.
I know we all love our new, sleek, futuristic little cell phones, but why can't they build one that's not so slippery? I know we all like to pretend they're tricorders, but if it's so smooth you can't hang on to it and drop it in the toilet, that doesn't help anybody.
Owens sausage has a flavor designated "Extra Mild." What the Hell is that? Is it super-average? Is it extra-medium? Does it have that certain lack of taste that mild foods have, except an exciting amount of it?
I'm really enjoying ABC's Better Off Ted , it seems to have hit its stride. My favorite line from the episode?
"We enjoy varieties of people...even though we can't eat them."
Even more importantly, last night's episode had what I call the "The Holy Shit Moment," or HSM for the purposes of discussion.
The HSM is something that every new series seems to strive for early in their run, the one moment where notice is served that the show will take chances. The Shield, Seinfeld, Brothers and Sisters, all with an HSM in their first few episodes.
American Idol ran long this week, thus putting the screws to anyone recording it through a Tivo or DVR. Adam's performance wasn't even aired inside of the hour, which would put pretty much anyone except Adam at a severe disadvantage.
Is it that hard to start cutting Paula's rambling comments off earlier on in the show, just so everyone will have time to perform? Slip her a Red Bull in the dressing room or something.
ABC's "Life On Mars" officially bit the dust tonight, wrapping up with a seventeen-episode run. The show never recovered from a two-month hiatus, and even a fan petition to save the show didn't help.
I really enjoyed this show, but as the weeks went on, it was clear I was one of the few still watching. It had a great cast, a good hook, and exciting weekly stories while the big mystery was being solved. I don't know if the general viewership didn't like the time travel twist, or just gave up on it when the show vanished for two months.
At least ABC cancelled it with enough notice they could wrap up the show. The fear of leaving a show with metaphysical questions unanswered is what usually scares me away from any show that tries to be "deep." I'm still recovering from the abrupt end ABC put to "Day Break" a few years ago. That's also the reason HBO's "John From Cincinnati" sat on my DVR for weeks until I heard it wasn't going to be renewed. You hate to waste an investment of time.
These kind of shows don't really build an audience. When you're asking the audience to be smart, either they go along with you or they don't. Your ratings don't significantly rise. Lost is the prime example here. It's one of the biggest shows on major TV of the last decade, and the ratings for it aren't going up (and probably won't until the last few episodes).
As a strange coincidence, the original British version of this show only ran sixteen episodes and was considered a big hit. It even spawned a sequel. In America, seventeen episodes makes it a failure.
According to Wikipedia (not always a reliable source), the DVD is planned for release September 29, 2009, and it will contain the full run of the show. I highly recommend it.
The NBC drama "ER" has finally ended its run, fifteen years after staking its claim to Thursday night.
In all honesty, I haven't watched the show regularly in this decade. Still, it's hard to believe the show that anchored NBC's Thursday night lineup since 1994 is gone. For comparison's sake, ER began the same week as Friends, which has already completed its run, spawned a sequel (Joey, the modern day AfterMASH), and become a mainstay of syndication.
ER debuted under the banner of Michael Crichton, fresh off his Jurassic Park success. The show was number one in the ratings within two years, and made George Clooney a household name, medical dramas cool again, and Eriq La Salle famous for something other than being the "Soul Glo" guy in Coming To America.
ER was in the top two for the first five years of its run, and in the top ten for the first decade. Phil Rosenthal points out we may never see another drama like it again. With NBC giving the 10-11 (EST) to Jay Leno five nights a week, there's less room for new dramas than ever before.
Even with declining ratings, the show still had drawing power. It had award winners on set and behind the scenes, and a parade of former cast members came back for the final season to pay tribute to the show that either started their careers, or was still at the top of their resumes.
Everyone's got their favorite episodes, "Love's Labor Lost" was the one that grabbed me and hooked me in. They did an Emmy-winning live episode just to show they could, and the fate of Rocket Romano was sad, ironic, and yet somehow hilarious. Here's a compilation of some of the best.
A few quick reviews and questions about the final episode of ABC's "Life On Mars" from last night.
Early reviews weren't too positive for the finale. It did seem a bit rushed, like they just cut the original script ten minutes short to throw in a quick explanation.
This was one that the longer I thought about it, the more questions came up. I was willing to overlook a lot for the purposes of story completion, including the ridiculous notions that Harvey Keitel was a) in any kind of physical shape for a space mission, and b) NASA would let his white bucks be the first shoes to set foot on Mars.
However, one question sticks with me. Where was Lisa Bonet? Did I miss her? She was pretty much the driving force behind the pilot episode, and she was listed in the credits for the finale. I don't remember ever seeing her. If I've missed her appearance, please feel free to enlighten me.
"Guiding Light," the longest running program in broadcast history, is done for. CBS has announced the show will end September 18.
While soap opera ratings have been declining for years, this one's a serious blow for the industry. GL has been on the air for seventy-two years, starting as a fifteen-minute radio show in 1937. For decades, GL has weathered every transition and detour, including the 90's cloning story arc and the ill-advised detour to San Cristobel. The show's handled every social issue from women's rights to alcoholism to cancer, but still couldn't survive the creeping death of the genre.
Worse yet for fans of the genre, a new soap opera won't get that timeslot. CBS plans to fill the hour with either a game show or talk show.
This seems to be pretty bad news both short term for fans of the show, and long term for anyone who's still a fan of soaps.
Possibly the best awful album ever is on sale today at Amazon.com. For today only, you can get William Shatner's testament to horribleness "The Transformed Man" for only 99 cents.
It has all the pompousness of 70's era Rush or Yes, but none of the musicianship. I am advising you to buy this, but please don't listen to it while operating heavy machinery.
ABC's "Life On Mars" officially bit the dust tonight, wrapping up with a seventeen-episode run. The show never recovered from a two-month hiatus, and even a fan petition to save the show didn't help.
I really enjoyed this show, but as the weeks went on, it was clear I was one of the few still watching. It had a great cast, a good hook, and exciting weekly stories while the big mystery was being solved. I don't know if the general viewership didn't like the time travel twist, or just gave up on it when the show vanished for two months.
At least ABC cancelled it with enough notice they could wrap up the show. The fear of leaving a show with metaphysical questions unanswered is what usually scares me away from any show that tries to be "deep." I'm still recovering from the abrupt end ABC put to "Day Break" a few years ago. That's also the reason HBO's "John From Cincinnati" sat on my DVR for weeks until I heard it wasn't going to be renewed. You hate to waste an investment of time.
These kind of shows don't really build an audience. When you're asking the audience to be smart, either they go along with you or they don't. Your ratings don't significantly rise. Lost is the prime example here. It's one of the biggest shows on major TV of the last decade, and the ratings for it aren't going up (and probably won't until the last few episodes).
As a strange coincidence, the original British version of this show only ran sixteen episodes and was considered a big hit. It even spawned a sequel. In America, seventeen episodes makes it a failure.
According to Wikipedia (not always a reliable source), the DVD is planned for release September 29, 2009, and it will contain the full run of the show. I highly recommend it.
"Guiding Light," the longest running program in broadcast history, is done for. CBS has announced the show will end September 18. (More info here)
While soap opera ratings have been declining for years, this one's a serious blow for the industry. GL has been on the air for seventy-two years, starting as a fifteen-minute radio show in 1937. For decades, GL has weathered every transition and detour, including the 90's cloning story arc and the ill-advised detour to San Cristobel. The show's handled every social issue from women's rights to alcoholism to cancer, but still couldn't survive the creeping death of the genre.
Worse yet for fans of the genre, a new soap opera won't get that timeslot. CBS plans to fill the hour with either a game show or talk show.
This seems to be pretty bad news both short term for fans of the show, and long term for anyone who's still a fan of soaps.
For more info on Soaps: Check out the columns from Mary Montanari, the Examiner's Soap Opera columnist.
The NBC drama "ER" has finally ended its run, fifteen years after staking its claim to Thursday night.
