Reid About It

The bag of leftover skin that used to be Star Jones has decided to give up her day job on the View. Apparently, she is deathly afraid of Rosie O'Donnell pointing out that Star lost most of her weight through surgery, vomiting, and the use of a belt sander.

She sprang this news on her cohosts Tuesday, surprising everyone and getting tossed off of the show. I'm sure Star will go on to continue her lifelong career of being famous for no apparent reason.

Axl Rose got into trouble in Sweden, biting a security guard in the leg. You know, about fifteen years ago, Axl was getting Swedish supermodels. Now, he's got to attack the Swedish rent-a cops. In 1991, hot chicks would have been lined up around the block for the opportunity to have that done to them. Now, that action is no longer consensual, and it cost Rose 1300 bucks.

Rush Limbaugh was caught trying to get on a plane with a prescription for Viagra that wasn't in his name.

At one point, I felt certain no one would ever make me feel creepier about Viagra than Bob Dole. I stand corrected.

The one-time Boy George got in trouble for refusing to do court-ordered community service, saying if he did outdoor activity, it "would turn into a media circus." I hate to break it to you, Boy, but unless you dress up like you did for the "Do You Really Want To Hurt Me Video" and dance on the roadside with your bag of trash, chances are nobody is going to recognize you. The 80's were a long time ago. At least that's what my Starbucks Barista, Adam Ant, told me.

And Naomi Campbell isn't exactly fun to work for. While she's in court defending herself after throwing a phone at one employee, yet another maid is accusing her of assault. Why do these people keep taking these jobs? I would think if you worked in the service industry in Hollywood, you would at least want to subscribe to Entertainment Weekly and read the "Arrests" page so you'd know what to expect. You don't want to be Naomi Campbell's maid, you don't want to be responsible for getting Hank Williams Jr. to his concert, and you don't want to do anything at all for Whitney Houston and Bobby Brown.