Reid About It

Hurricane Rita is making landfall in Texas in a few minutes, which means that we here in East Texas, a full four hours from the shore, will probably get wet. It'll rain, some stuff will blow around, and the power may go out for a little while.

However, with their typical lack of rational thought, East Texans have made off with everything that can be purchased or stolen in the area for the last two days. Bottled water? Sold out. Overpriced gas? Just empty tanks. Ice? You can set it out and make water with it, so no.

It's going to rain. Get over it. Stop hoarding shit that won't keep you alive, anyway. I saw a woman at Wal-Mart with two fucking cases of Wolf brand chili, and a metric assload of crackers. What's that going to do for you when the power goes out? You going to light farts as rescue flares? Calm, rational thought, people.

As I walked around Wal-Mart, which was even funnier than usual, there was so much panic, I started to worry I was the one who wasn't panicking enough, I'd look at things I'd never buy in a million years, and imagine a scenario where I'd need them.

Me: "Hmm. What if I never get a another chance to buy that Best Of The Allman Brothers CD? I might want to hear Sweet Melissa while society crumbles to a halt during a fifteen minute power outage. Maybe I should buy a copy of Sam Walton's autobiography to read in the dark. They sure seem to have a lot of copies for sale."