Reid About It

ABC: Desperate Housewives -- Susan trips over things, Bree is uptight, Lynette tricks Tim, Gaby is a sociopath (repeat).
ABC: Lost -- In a cruel twist, the Oceanic 7 are picked to be on the new season of "Big Brother."
ABC: Extreme Home Makeover -- The gang makes over Neverland Ranch in an attempt to make it more kid-friendly, with disasterous results.
CBS: Two-And-A-Half Men -- Charlie and Alan discuss with Jake how it's possible that their show has been on for five years, and yet no one has any memories of ever watching it.
CBS: CSI: Duluth
NBC: ER -- For the 14th consecutive year, horrible things happen at County General Hospital, which must have been built on an Indian burial ground or something.
NBC: Deal or No Deal -- Howie Mandel gets America to laugh at a woman who just swapped $100,000 for a roll of quarters.
NBC: America's Got Talent -- Live coverage proves actually no, it doesn't.
FOX: 24 -- Jack Bauer finds his new mission is to free Keifer Sutherland from jail.
FOX: Family Guy -- Peter equates Brian's rabies with the time he worked as P-Diddy's pool cleaner.
MTV: Pimp My Mom
VH1: I Love Yesterday Morning
ESPN: Live coverage of Brett Favre sitting in traffic.
NFL NETWORK: Fashion Week -- Live coverage of ESPN's coverage of Brett Favre.
VH1: Behind the Music -- The tragic fate of Josie and the Pussycats.
BRAVO: Inside The Actor's Studio -- Examines Christopher Walken's career, from up and coming weirdo to highly respected creepy bastard.
TRAVEL: "Branson, Wal-Mart's Las Vegas"
FOOD: "Cooking for Bulemics"