Resolver
For the New Year, I will make the following resolutions. Please note that in no way am I to be held to my word on any of these.
- Get published. This is my number one goal for the year, to acquire a literary agent for one of my novels, and get published.
- Blog my heart out. At her blog, Tena commented that as she's working on her novel this year, she may blog less often. It'll be the opposite for me. I'll still write here, especially for the stuff that doesn't fit anywhere else. I may be working on a book, but I'll always need a place to write stuff like "Mischa Barton's mug shot makes her look like she just got pulled out of a trailer on COPS." It's hard to work that into a novel.
- Knock out the fast food. I have to realize that with exception of Chick-Fil-A, which is only a chicken sandwich, every single fast food experience I ever have is a bad one. Even the rare occasions where I actually get my food as I ordered it, it's never worth the price I pay either monetarily or in terms of discomfort. As George Carlin said, once you factor in the cost of the angioplasty, those dollar menu items cost quite a bit more than a buck.
- Not drink so many Cokes. Every year, my annual resolution has been to stop drinking soft drinks. My vow to abstain varies in degrees of success, ranging from eleven months to fifteen minutes. This year, I'm just going to cut down and not cut out, perhaps I'll be more successful.
- Handle work. Let me explain. I know my blog is read by a lot of people who I work with at ye olde television sweatshop, so obviously, I don't blog about work. If you work with me and would like to know more, please approach me with some kind of secret code word, like "eggplant" or something. The rest of you, you'll have to wait.
- Purchase a house. Currently, I live in the smallest, shittiest apartment imaginable. I live in the kind of place that broke the spirit of Billy Hayes. Worse yet, it's located about thirty yards from a college, so it's basically a dorm with less supervision.
- No heroin. This is an easy one. I don't use it now, so this one will be splashy, but easy to keep.
- Cut down on the Wikipedia. I got hooked on wikipedia a month or so ago, and quickly became addicted. You think arguing on the internet is pointless, you should try keeping vigilant watch against vandals who keep trying to drop the word "BOOBS" into an encyclopedia article about Brett Favre. There's got to be a better way to spend my evenings.
- Get in shape. I will attempt to begin working out. Barring this, I will attempt to begin watching the "Working Out TV Channel".
- Clean it up. I will try to hold my profanity to a minimum, unless I am driving, at work, or at home.
- Throw it out. I will learn to resist the urge to open SPAM emails with really funny subject lines. Just this past week I fell prey to "Hymen Destroyer," "Transcribe Parcenary Bulgary," and "We Want Yur Skin!". I'm a sucker for good rhythmic gibberish.
- Career path. I will make good on my promise to go back to school and finish my athletic management degree, so I can achieve my lifelong goal of becoming a professional wrestling referee.
Happy New Year, everybody!
3 Comments:
Your resolution list looks like mine. One of my worst vices is having a gloriously foul mouth, and every year, I resolve to cut out the cussing. But in 2008, I say fuck that shit.
Happy 2008!
Since I am a cat, I have no resolutions, as I am perfect and fabulous as is.
I'm thinking cutting out the fast food isn't such as bad idea. I don't want to pick up the Texas section of the Houston Chronicle and read about a man in Tyler going Apeshit over an soft tacos. That would be tragic.
Be wary of those Chick-fil-A people, though; they might be peddling Grilled Chicken, but watch the mayo-- that's where they kill ya.
-- P
I actually make my students post Wikipedia pages for their research project. They usually get whiny because "no one else has to use credible sources on Wikipedia, so why do I?!" Some of the battles they get in with people who have pronounced themselves the official "gatekeeper" of certain Wiki pages is hilarious, though. (Witness: Bob vs. Falcoln, in which Student Bob vies with committed Vampire Falcoln over who gets to post a page on "Sanguinarians.")
What kinds of novels do you write?
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