Reid About It

Apparently, there's some kind of turf war going on between AT&T and Verizon. Something about maps, and coverage, and signals, and reindeer, and whatnot.

Have you seen the new series of commercials for AT&T, you know, the ones with Luke "The Not Quite As Funny Looking One" Wilson? He's got a stack of postcards, and he's reading a list of places where they've got coverage.

"Dallas, Texas...Phoenix, Arizona...Denver, Colorado...I lost my wallet there once..."

Are they trying to impress us with their coverage by saying you can get phone service in most major metropolitan areas?

When I'm in a city that has pubic transit and an NFL team, I just naturally assume I'll be able to make a phone call as long as I'm above ground. Face it, if your cell phone doesn't have coverage in Dallas, maybe you should think about paying more than five bucks a month for the service.

It's not making calls in Dallas and Santa Fe I'm worried about, it's Deliverance-ville, Alabama. It's Ballsac, Oklahoma. It's Spitoonville, Arkansas. It's anywhere my car might run off the road, and my phone is the only thing between me and an unfortunate intimate relationship with a bald banjo player.