Reid About It

I was at Wal-Mart last night doing some late night, searching for cheap crap and ugly people, and I ran across this sign.

Wonder of wonders, sakes alive, and holy crap! Look at the deep discount Wal-Mart is offering on this item. They've rolled the savings on this item all the way past a nickel. Every time you snag one of these rock-bottom bargains, you save an entire six cents.

I mean, I know Wal-Mart tries to do its best to slash prices, but come on! Knocking the cost of this thing down to a mere ninety-nine percent of the original price tag? How are they going to keep their doors open and pay their employees?

I was so astonished by the price rollback, I didn't even notice what they were selling. It doesn't matter. It was such a good deal, I bought three of them. First thing tomorrow when the banks open, I'm going to deposit the cool eighteen cents I saved into a brand new 401(k) account. I'm set for life, baby!