You Oughtta Know (Better)
Ryan Reynolds and Alanis Morrissette are still dating. For those who may not know, Reynolds is that guy who's always the funny guy in his movies, and Alanis is the angry singer whose name is actually "Atlantis" with the "letter "t" removed.
Anyway, they were engaged this year and broke it off, but now they're back together.
Let me explain this from a guy's point of view. Of course they're still together. Alanis is not somone you can safely break up with. Have you ever listened to "You Oughtta Know"? It's the best, bitterest, most vengeful breakup song ever. Anybody who can get that pissed off about a guy from "Full House" is not somebdy you want to cross.
She's somebody you have to hang around for a while, gradually disillusioning them about you until THEY make the decision to leave. That way you won't wind up immortalized in song, with not only vengeful comments but also your own personal perversions laid bare for the whole world to dance to.
"Will she go down on you in a theatre?
Will she cover herself in butter for you?
Will she brand herself with your name?
Will she blow a park ranger while you watch?
Will she? Huh? Huh? Aaaarrrrrggggghhhhhhhh"
Yeah, exercise extreme caution when disengaging. In fact, you might want to wear a helmet and a cup.
1 Comments:
To this day that song still makes me cringe......It's like something disconnects inside my head when I think about the fact that Alanis went down on the man behind the voice of "The Jackalope" in a theatre......No wonder those Olsen twins are so messed up after working with that guy for years...
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