"Straight Lines"

He heard something in the distance. A rumbling, getting closer. He thought, as he drifted in and out of consciousness, that it sounded slightly like an angry Yosemite Sam.

"Hey! You awake in there?" Guido roared to G. Eliot Randall. "Wakey, wakey, Mario Andretti! Somebody's got to pay for my car!"

G. Eliot Randall opened his eyes to see the enormous form of Guido approaching the car and berating him. On instinct, he responded with righteous indignation.

"Young man, I don't know who you are, but you obviously have no idea who I am."

"Uh, let's see," Guido said as he peered through the broken windshield. "Idi Amin? Keith Richards? Tony Stark?"

"No. I am G. Eliot Randall, and..."

"Never heard of you. You shoulda said you were Tony Stark. I'da believed you. Now what are you going to do about my...uh, oh."

Guido heard a crack above him and looked up as the utility pole began to collapse. It splintered backward, snapping the high power lines and sending one of them downward toward the vehicle of one Mr. G. Eliot Randall.

"AAAAAHHHHH!" screamed G. Eliot Randall. "AAAAAHHHHH!" screamed Guido Carosella, as he instinctively grabbed the power wires. The electricity poured through him as he drained the power away from the vehicle. Guido was absorbing the electricity, but his body was having some difficulty accepting the energy. Once again, his form began to contort to accept the new store of power.

"G-g-g-get out of t-t-the car," Guido struggled out.

"I can't! The doors are jammed! I can't move!"

Guido began to feel the frustration build inside of him. He looked down at his right arm, and he felt it grow to Hulk-sized proportions even though the rest of his body hadn't started to grow yet. The pain rose inside of him, and he looked around for something to expend his energy on. He couldn't hit the utility pole, because that would snap another power line. There were no trees or rocks to smash nearby, and he couldn't move away from the car or the driver would be electrocuted.

What the hell, he thought.

G. Eliot Randall had almost passed out again when a resounding crunch woke him. He rubbed his eyes to clear the fog, and looked out to see an enormous hand pulling itself out of his engine block.
"What in the world are you doing?" he asked feebly.

"I've got to burn off this energy," Guido replied. "Until they turn off the juice, I've got to drain it off, and to do that..." Guido paused as his body once again trembled and distorted.

"I've got to let it out!"

Guido once again plunged his fist into the formerly brand new shiny black 1995 Range Rover's engine compartment, this time dipping deeper. G. Eliot Randall could hear his transmission crack. Once more, Guido raised up a mighty misshapen fist.

Miles away, a relay was tripped and power was shut off to the cable in Guido's left hand.

With a sigh, Guido dropped the cable. He leaned against the remains of the Range Rover, exhausted. Looking across the road, he saw the remains of his own car.

He pulled loose the door and let G. Eliot Randall climb out of the frame of his car. As G. Eliot Randall staggered away, Guido let both of his mighty fists down on top of the Range Rover's roof. All three remaining doors bent outwards, as the car sank down into the ground.

"What was that for?" G. Eliot Randall angrily asked.

"That's for not paying attention and wrecking my only ride," Guido replied. He reached into the car and pulled out the cellular phone. "You mind if I borrow this?"

G. Eliot Randall began to speak, then was silenced by a massive hand placed over his face.

"Didn't think so. Thanks, Lee Harvey. Yeah, hello there. Val Cooper please. This'll just take a minute, pal. Hey, Val. This is Guido Carosella. I've thought it over, and I think I'd be perfect in your organization. Thanks for the invite.

"Uh, by the way. Does that salary come with an auto club membership?"